6/17/14
“You don’t lose friends, because real friends can never be lost. You lose people masquerading as friends, and you’re better for it.” Mandy Hale
The end of a relationship is something that I dread. I would much rather have a relationship fade out. Like when I move teams at work and I don’t see people everyday, and I understand that we were friends because we sat next to each other - that kind of fading out.
Relationships complicate life, friendships or romantic. As you meet people and try to work them into your existing schedule with family and friends and work and school and social activities, you grow attached and try to see the future with this person and how the future will include them.
As you do this, you need to spend time with this new person over your other friends so that you can learn more about them and if they are a good fit for you or not. Sometimes this new relationship shows lots of promise and you do take the time to invest in it. So you start introducing them to your current friends and family circle. This complicates it more.
As I have learned over the last six years, I do not like losing people. I have made and lost several friendships and many romantic relationships. It is getting harder to move on and try to fill the void that the new person left with the friends and family that you still have around because you have created so much time for the new person.
I think that this is something that scares me most about the next part of my journey. Moving to a new city and maintaining the solid, life long relationships with my friends and family that will still be in Green Bay and trying to create and develop new relationships in Milwaukee. I do not handle small talk well, I do not like big groups or large friend outings, and I need my space. I am a classic introvert - which surprises most people because I have grown to play an extrovert in real life ;)
However, with each ending of a relationship of any kind, I have learned what is important to me and what I need to find in the next relationship - again, friendship or romantic. The things that I find important in a person are: honesty, loyalty, time, a good combination of listening and venting, hugs, understanding, acceptance and a little adventure.
Please do not misunderstand me, I have ended my share of relationships too over the last thirty-nine years, but I tend to take longer to see that it will not work. I do not like to give up on people or ideas or goals. My needs as a person have changed too. I also understand that sometimes I am not an easy person to get along with.
With all of this said, I truly love and cherish my solid relationships. Some people I do not see everyday, nor once a week, but your presence in my life makes a difference. Some people are just friends online and that too is ok and I value those relationships too.
So Thanks for being my friend!
Megan
